It feels like a sad numb low emotion type day. I miss my family. I want my husband. I just want to sit on the couch in his arms. Watch my children play, listen to their cute little voices.
This is how I felt today. Being alone was not fun. Alone was very alone today. Its when I want to build a nest and hide away from the world. I become extra thankful for having my place in this world. The world feels too big for me today. I don't want to look at the stars, I don't want to look at the view. I want to look two inches in front of me. Simple. Simple. Simple. I can not handle the vastness of space, the news of the nation. I want peace but not quiet. I need You Jesus to quiet my mind. To speak peace to my soul.
So I look right in front of me and I see a palm tree swaying lovingly above me. I'm here, I'm small, I'm not lost in the complexities of my emotions, chemicals, wires. I'm here, safe in my husbands arms, watching my children play. Even though there is such complexity inside, craziness, sadness, uncontrollable swishing. I focus on whats right in front of me. Love. And instead of faith I believe in what I see.